The Midas Touch

The Six Million Dollar Blog - The Six Million Dollar Man and The Bionic Woman
Friday, November 15, 1974
Plot in a Nutshell: 
Oscar gets stung in his own sting.
Story Summary: 

Oscar drives up to an old abandoned mine on government property that hasn't been occupied for over 20 years. As he arrives, men with guns open the gate to let him in. He meets with the foreman, MacGregor, who informs him that the illegal operation has already mined over $25 million in gold. Oscar smiles and says "That's not bad, MacGregor."

Holy cats! Has Oscar gone rogue? Find out after these important messages:

We come back from commercial to find Steve working on his car. Oscar's secretary, The-Callahan-Prototype, calls and informs Steve she has no idea where Oscar is. He last checked in from Las Vegas and now he's not around for his meetings and his paperwork is untouched. Steve joins her at the office and they begin their investigation.

An investigation that could see Steve doing 25 to life for accessing state secrets.

The top secret documents lead Steve and The-Callahan-Prototype to Oscar's old college chum, Bert Carrington, who runs the mining and research divison. Steve meets with Carrington and discovers that Oscar is mixed up in illegal gold mining. Carrington leads Steve to Oscar's secret office on Parker Street.

"Parker Street? Oh, yes, Parker Street. I once knew a girl who lived on Parker Street, a long time ago, when I was a young man. Not a day passes I don't think of her and the promise I made, which I will always keep. That one perfect day on Parker Street. That's five blocks up, two over."

Already facing the prospect of substantial jail time, Steve goes ahead and shatters the door to Oscar's secret office and tears the concrete-encased safe out from underneath the window.

What good are bionics if you can't use them for a little mayhem and destruction now and then?

The safe is full of the Top Secret paperwork from Oscar's main office. Steve follows the paperwork trail to the gold mine in Nevada. As he's driving down the dirt road, his front tire is shot out and then he's held at gunpoint by a guy named Connors, who claims he's trespassing. Steve takes it all in stride, commenting that he "figured I'd done something wrong."

"Guns don't bother me, it's the bullets I'm concerned about."

Steve is brought to the mine and meets MacGregor, who already knows who he is. MacGregor tells Steve the whole mining operation is Oscar's idea and then puts Steve to work in the mine under the supervision of Connors while they wait for Oscar to become "available."

"Swing loooowwww, sweet chaaaaariot..."

Suddenly, a mining cart full of rocks breaks free and rolls menacingly toward Connors. He runs to a deadend and cowers, he has no chance, his fate is sealed. But then, just in the nick of time, Steve grabs the cart and bionically drags it to a stop. Connors is saved!

"Hey, thanks there...um...you wouldn't happen to have a spare pair of pants, would you?"

That night, when all is quiet, Steve breaks out of the barracks he's sleeping in and searches for Oscar. He finds Oscar drugged and sleeping in a building covered with iron bars. He breaks in, throws Oscar over his shoulder and runs out, but they are quickly captured.

"Stupid sunlight in the middle of the night!"

They are then brought before the Mastermind, Oscar's old buddy, Bert Carrington.

"Excuse me while I pose triumphantly."

Carrington wants to bring Oscar in on the deal, 25% of $25 Million in return for an airplane to Marseille, but Oscar refuses. Carrington next threatens to kill Steve and Oscar relents.

The gold, all smelted and bricked, is loaded in a truck and the main players leave for the airport. Connors and a guy named Eric are tasked with driving Steve out to the desert. Connors thinks it's just to leave him to walk back, but Eric is there to kill him. When the time comes, Connors is shocked...

SHOCKED, I tell you!

...to discover the truth and refuses to give Eric the shotgun. They fight and in the confusion Steve breaks his bonds and destroys the gun. He then takes off in the jeep, presumably leaving Connors and Eric to walk home.

He catches up with MacGregor driving the gold truck and hops on board.

"Don't mind me, I'll just ride out here."

Steve forces MacGregor to keep driving while he hides in the truck. When they arrive at the airport, Steve is knocked out by Carrington's men but awakens just in time for this:

Woo Hoo!

Steve runs up to the airplane and jumps in just before the cargo bay door closes. A short fight ensues and Carrington gets his just deserts.

Then, before the final credits roll, a few more important messages. Keep your eyes on this one, it looks like Connors got away and finally found himself a respectable job:

The End

How Did You Do That Quote:

Connors: "How...how did you do that?"

Lt. Evers: "Col. Austin. Sir...about the way that you got up into that plane..."

Move your mouse over Steve to see his answer.

Overall Rating:
This is Steve, he is a Bionic Man.
Final Thoughts: 

Three Steves. A solid and enjoyable episode. Not much else to say here, really.

This is a test

Old Comments: 

Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System = Awesome Bionic Power

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Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System = Bionic Power at Normal Human Levels

Bionic Eye Rating System Bionic Eye Rating System = Needs a Bionic Tune-Up

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